Sobering

For a change, this week, I am at home working in Singapore, and she is away in KL. We will probably have more of this over the next ten weeks, as she pursues her crossposting assignment in KL.

Two things happened.

For the first time in my life, I could not sleep. Proper insomnia. It had nothing to do with her absence, but the overhang of pending work. I am not good at this. I need to learn my lesson.

And, I woke up to the most depressing gloom of an empty house. I asked myself how she was putting up with that every single morning that I was away. How brave she is, and how fortunate I am.

Which would mean that all this is worthwhile only if it really means something to me, and if I get something out of it.

Sobering. Takes completely away from the email announcing my qualification for Krisflyer Gold. Bah.

And, I am completely in love. I still get a thing or two right.

Improvement

When I feel that I am becoming better, one step at a time. Feels good. No rush.

Detector

I woke up at four this morning to get some work done. Not exactly groundbreaking stuff. Having recently come to terms with the fact that I am a morning person, I was not exactly grumbling as well.

As the day goes on, my mood is only getting better, even if a colleague yelled "That is an ugly page" when confronted with something I had put together.

At lunch, another colleague was completely surprised to find out that I have been with the firm only 4 months. He estimated my tenure as at least 4 years.

Good signs. Feeling good.

Parallax

Every now and then, I run into someone, for whom this has been the ambition of a lifetime. For some, the superior choice. For some, the pinnacle.

For me, an accident. A positive one.

Is that why I sometimes struggle to find my purpose? In a great place. With potential unlimited.

As they say, I need to make My McKinsey. One day at a time.

Alive

Alive in Ideasland.

The surest antidote to stress from work overhang: Work.

Distress

Feeling guilty about being relaxed.

Thirty one

As she says, I now have as many years to my name, as there are days in the longest months.

Our own home, perfectly rendered.
Exciting new work that keeps me on my toes. Great people. I really wonder if I am cut out for good, hard work. I like it.
The oak and the cypress continue to grow, not in each other's shadow.
Three months of blissful solitude.
3.2 million years would have taken us to Lucy. We went to Olduvai instead.
78 million km would have taken us to Mars. We went to Nippon instead.

Another wonderful year. And, as I was thinking the other day, if the stars are kind, a full life it just might be, one year at a time.